I Feel Bad For Girls

God made man in His image. Then man was lonely. So God gave him a female. That is the one area where girls are lucky. If it weren’t for men being lonely, they wouldn’t even be. After that, it went downhill. God tells man not to eat of the forbidden fruit. Well, for some reason the man and the woman end up at that tree. The serpent talks to the woman, not the man. He entices her, and she submits. So does the man. God asks the man what he has done. Immediately the man says, “It’s all the woman’s fault! Why’d you give her to me anyway?” The woman blames the snake. All three get punished. What is humorous (if you’re a male or a snake) is the difference in punishments between the three.

Man: Has a hard time working.

Snake: Doesn’t get feet anymore.

Woman: Must go through nine months of intense pain, sickness, and back aches. Finally, when the wonderful day comes, she gives birth in unbearable pain.

This is bad enough, but at last, when all her hard work is done, the man takes the baby, and names it after himself. Then, to top this sundae with a cherry, the woman does not get mentioned in the family tree.

Well, times got a little better. After all, women became property and were sold as wives as a form of trade. They had no say in the home, and they were looked down on. Then, things got even better. They were not allowed to vote, or work outside the home, or even speak in public!

Many years later, woman were at the top of the world, as they were sent to Plymouth to marry men they had never met, who would most likely die in the next year. Things became almost fictionally superb when women were ordered as brides through the mail. Lucky females got to go live with fat old gold diggers who put them in the kitchen and never let her out.

Then came World War II. Finally women got their chance to serve their country as they built the planes men got to fly. If they were exceptionally blessed, they got to bandage soldiers who’s arms had been blown off.

Today, women have nearly every right of men, and yet they still are unlucky (at least in the Christian world). Now, they are told every second that what they are wearing is immodest. Now while there is much truth to this, and they should do their part to help out the men, it is just harder on them. Men can wear a speedo and people just say “gross”. A women wears a low cut shirt, and the Church starts a revival.

As a man, I’m not complaining, but I do feel bad for girls.